Freak

Sometimes if you really let yourself admit it, there's a side of you deep down and hidden, a freakish side. It's something that even you won't admit to yourself, because it makes you feel otherworldly, vulnerable, and dangerously apathetic. It's existence threatens everything you've let people know you as. But when you're alone and you let everything go, there's something wild and liberating about it. It's like you're standing in the foamy white tide of the sea as its cold hands wrap and caress your ankles, its sweet salty essence in the wind on your skin. And you embrace it, embrace who you are, a warm blanket of confidence.

Do You Believe in Fairies?

Watched the bachelor, season 14, week 4 today. The whole environment of this show is so fairytale-like! Most of the couples in the end don't get married, let alone stay together. In the real world, real life, love is not really a fairytale. Falling in love isn't really fancy exotic dates, candles and rose petals on every surface, lounging in hot tubs in spray tanned skin and a sexy bikini, or your heart flat out telling out who you're supposed to be with for the rest of your life. It's tough, often delicate, and heartwrenchingly confusing and scary.

I feel like the girl who just turned her back and refused to cry out, "I do believe in fairies, I do believe in fairies!"

New wine

You, you intoxicate me.
And You liberate me.
Your love is like wine on my lips, new wine
Raging wind, fresh on my skin.
Every moment with you, Makes my spirit new

Untouched, Unbroken

In their faces, I see yours. In their voices, my ears try so hard not to hear your whisper, your tickled heart warming laugh. The heart desires only what it can't have, what may hurt it most. I have never felt you never touched you, and so I don't understand. My mind makes it easier to forget, my heart makes it harder to lose. Each thought of such has become fewer as days pass ever so slowly. Would it have been easier to notice them if both of us had never known the other? Nothing matches up anymore to what I really want, what I will wait to obtain even if forever. What they offer is a lie, a binding mess of raw tether and iron chains with a million padlocks. I will save my purity of heart and soul only for this overflowing golden cup that is promised to me.